Thanksgiving is on its way. In just a few weeks, families and friends will gather to cook, share, and—most of all—eat. In the U.S., we pause for an entire day to reflect on gratitude, a tradition unlike any other.
The dictionary defines thankful as:
"Grateful, appreciative, pleased, or gratified—glad about something."
But for some, Thanksgiving isn’t just a time of joy. It can also be a day of loneliness, grief, and reflection.
When Thanksgiving Feels Bittersweet
For many, Thanksgiving is filled with warmth, love, and the smell of pumpkin pie. But for others, it serves as a painful reminder of what’s missing.
The empty chair at the table—a loved one who is no longer here
Family tensions—stress stretching a joyful moment into an exhausting day
Loneliness—spending the holiday alone or far from family
Cruse Bereavement Support explains that holidays and anniversaries can amplify grief, even years after a loss. A day meant for gratitude can feel heavy with absence.
The Power of Everyday Gratitude
Yet, even in the hardest moments, gratitude has the power to ground us. Studies show that practicing daily gratitude can improve mental well-being and resilience (Verywell Mind).
For me, Thanksgiving isn’t just a one-day event—it’s a way of looking at life. I’ve learned to appreciate the small, everyday moments that remind me I am still surrounded by love.
Even when loss lingers, gratitude can take root. Small “pebbles of thankfulness” create inner strength, building a foundation we can lean on when life’s storms hit.
Hospice of the Red River Valley suggests creating new traditions to balance grief with gratitude. This can be as simple as:
✔️ Lighting a candle for those who are missing
✔️ Sharing a memory of a loved one at the table
✔️ Expressing gratitude aloud for the people still in your life
Gratitude doesn’t erase loss, but it helps us hold both love and longing in the same space.
Thanksgiving is a Blessing—In Every Form
So, as the holiday approaches, I’m choosing to embrace it fully—not just for the food and traditions, but for the people who fill my life.
🍂 I’ll set the table with space for those who are present and those I carry in my heart.
🥧 I’ll enjoy the pumpkin pie while cherishing the memories that sweeten the moment.
💛 I’ll remind myself that gratitude is not about what’s missing but what remains.
Thanksgiving is more than a holiday—it’s a way of seeing the world every single day.
How do you navigate gratitude during the holidays? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.
~ Janet Haney
Additional Resources on Grief & Gratitude
📌 Coping with Holidays After Loss: Cruse Bereavement Support
📌 The Science of Gratitude & Mental Health: Verywell Mind
📌 Balancing Grief & Thanksgiving Traditions: Hospice of the Red River Valley